#6 Bunch of Clives

Three tone Ska favourites Bunch of Clives formed in April 1972 in the southern English metropolis and home of the UK Hydrographic Office, Taunton.

Cider drenched Somerset may seem an unlikely venue for such an insidious and heady mix of young male instrumentalists and the popular music of the day. And why the extra tone I hear you cry? (As we all did when we heard the laidback stylings of 'Knees Up for Camden' for the first time). For the seven young affiliates of Bunch of Clives two tone was "all a bit black and white". Whereas two tone was built around ska, punk and reggae The Clives subtly blended all the above with the apocalyptic sounds of 'viking metal' (popularised at the time by Scandinavian doom merchants Abbott Rabbit). And, surprisingly given their traditional West Country upbringing, the Clives' only had three songs about apples, one about cheese and only two named actual makes of combine harvester.

The band themselves comprised Timothy "Clive" Branson (tambourine), Neville "Clive" Hebblethwaite (vocals), Randy "Clive" McRand (snare drum) , Boris Clive"Horace (sousaphone), Steve M "Clive" Chambers (tromboneaphone), The Professor (kazoo/accordion) and Terry "Nigel" Grantham (guitar). Their unusual grouping of instruments was testament to their desire to infuse a little Somerset culture to their music, whilst not being the Wurzles. Bunch of Clives succeeded where so many before had failed - The Winzles, Hay Bail Bob, Wimble Hill and The Wazzles to name four. Where many failed theirs soon became the key sound and ethos of the three tone sound.

The septet's first and only performance took place whilst travelling on the 25a bus home from Cotsford St Luke. The group had partaken in a little light solo busking, had picked up their dole money and, after an impromptu visit to the local Woolworths, headed home.

Little is known about the hirsute hebdomad. One thing we do know is that the sultry seven never released a song. By the time they disbanded in early May 1972 three of the band had never actually got to play an instrument. Rumor has it the bus journey was shorter than they had remembered and they were yet to reach a part where two of the band came in. Timothy had earlier missed his cue - only later did he give his tambourine a little shake. By that stage the gig was over, the band had split up and the rest of the members were sitting at home watching hit tv show 'It's a Knockout' and were tucking into Postman Pat spaghetti shapes on toast.
Perhaps the group's longest lasting legacy is the Clives' patented dance (patent pending). Within a week of their vehicular recital, youths all the way from Creech St Michael to Cheddon Fitzplaine were copying the impromptu jiggling of Clives' sousaphone player Boris Horace. The story goes that whilst helping a hapless pensioner onto the bus Boris stumbled, fell a little and collapsed onto said OAP with fatal consequences. Despite the subsequent legal action his flailing leg and arm combination was hypnotic, and due to the lizard like movements which participants use, the term 'Skinking' was coined.

The Clives' sound became well-beloved by many far-right skinheads who happened to be on the same bus. Neville in particular found this hard to deal with, as he was later quoted as saying "men without hair are like man-babies" and that it "just wasn't right". Neville's follicle prejudice had already gotten him into trouble on five previous occasions. One particular incident saw him charged with assaults on no less than seven threadbare celebrities in one night, including Sinead O'Connor, The Dalai Lama and all three of 'Blue Man Group'.

The group still hold the record for the shortest three tone song of all time. At 1.5 seconds 'Your Hurtful Words are Like a (Bullet in my Head Bone)' is a soaring piece of muscianship that in many ways defined the three tone sound. The group were soon visited by star of genre bending hit TV show Record Breakers, Roy Castle. Castle awarded the group with their certificate, branded paperweight and a signed photo of Noris McWhirter. McWhirter, who couldn't make the presentation, was overseeing a record for 'most Capuchin monkeys wearing trousers at one time'.

The attempt failed and the record stands at six.