Friday, October 23, 2009

NEWSFLASH! Folking Facists?


You may remember that we featured a group by the name of Patch Chudkins as our second-ever band You Have Not Heard? Well, it seems that fears that our little trio were a little on the wrong side of right have proved probably founded, maybe.

Following growing discontent amongst Stephen Fry that the band were in fact a musical front for the English KKK - BBC's Watchdog program launched an undercover expose on the the two surviving members of the band - Guthrie and Ruth Archibold. In an unparalleled act of cunning Watchdog stalwart Matt Allwright dressed up as a tree and surprised the pair at a National Front meeting in June. The group claim that Allwright was sent as a BBC lynch mob to bring the pair's career to an end over comments on camera regarding unsaid, unfounded and unproven truths (that were unprovenly unfounded and true). It has to be said that Allwright did not help the situation by appearing with a noose hanging from one of his branches. However, the expose brought an end to any likely comeback for the pair and came mere weeks after Guthrie's release from prison on licence. The band were due to release their next album in 2010 (working title - "Heading Through the GriffinDoor").

Late last night and apparently in protest of Allwright's handiwork, the pair stormed into television centre demanding air time. One of the Dimbleby brothers, we cannot be sure which one at this stage, with the help of Jeremy Paxo, took them on in a two versus two, melee, tag team, cage fight showdown. We believe the Paxo-Dimbleby combo dispatched of both Archibold's, ending with a piledriver that caused Weather presenter Daniel Corbett to wet himself live on News24.

The pair are currently being questioned by Police but are expected to make an official complaint against the BBC. The basis of the complaint is thought to centre around things they said that were true but have since become untrue, unsaid and slightly more acceptable in the public eye.

The trial continues.


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